get 'em right now, the best lame jokes evah!
What do you call an alligator wearing a vest?
An in-vest-i-gator
Did you hear about the cowboy who adopted a dachshund?
He just wanted to get a long, little doggy.
Why do Peruvian owls fly in pairs?
Because they're Inca hoots.
Where do they send bad rainbows?
Prism.
They get a light sentence, though.
It gives them time to reflect.
What do you call a mansplaining amphibian?
A well-actuallotl
What color is the wind?
Blew
Which nut is the angriest?
Pissed-achio
How does Moses make tea?
Hebrews it
What do you get when you cross a mosquito and a mountain climber?
You can't cross a vector with a scalar.
What do you call a sad coffee?
A depresso
What do you call a chilly cephalopod?
Coolamari.
What do you call two octopuses that look the same?
Itentacle.
What should you do if you’re addicted to seaweed?
Sea kelp.
A photon checks into a hotel, and the staff asks if they need help with any bags?
The photon says “No, I’m travelling light”.
Why are the grasshoppers all cultists?
Because they're in sects.